Crazy.Happy.Fun.

I walk into Chipoltle with Thing 1 and Thing 2. They are super excited! As we walk in, there are ladies looking at us, "Aw are they twins?! They are so cute!" People are very friendly. So it's really just me that starts to feel anxiety rise as my little chipmunks start making crazy, loud, excited sounds, flapping their hands and making all kinds of atypical movements and gestures. My babies are tall - they look like they could be 5. My brain goes in all different directions! "Oh, no, now these people see something isn't right. They are trying to figure it out, I'm sure. Do they look at me and wonder if I am not teaching them? I wish Aliyah would stop yelling "Eeeeeeeeeeeee!" (Her happy vowel) and doing that crazy happy dance! Do these people think we are a freak show?" Somewhere in the middle of my embarrassment and the chaos, we found a table. As I recognized my feelings of annoyance at the toddlers and the tension I had myself, God suggested I was carrying a burden that He was willing to take away. So, I sat there for a minute and thought. And I looked at my sweet kiddos who were in euphoria, so excited to be at Chipoltle. Their happy little faces just lit up! And I considered what if I just had fun and let others do what they are going to do or think. How about I just focus on the mini people in front of me and accept them unconditionally whether others do not. And I have to say, people are generally very nice to us. I am creating this anxiety monster. At the pool this summer I will think, "what are the other moms thinking about my kids still in swim diapers?" And I will remind myself to listen to God telling me "enjoy this moment, love your kids where they're at." Honestly, none of us can get by very well without letting go of all the fears of what others may or may not be thinking about us. And where would I be without God who accepts me right where I am in my own growth and development. God helps me love like He does, crowding out the yucko feelings with fun and peace.